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Funny How Time Flies When The Apocalypse Nears
It seems like the older we get, the faster that time goes. Every month you hear people say, “Wow! I can’t believe it’s already July!” or “Wow! I can’t believe it’s already November!” Next thing you’re saying soon it will the year 2001 or 2010 or in our soon to be case- 2012. I suppose 2001 was a space odyssey as we continue to find space to put all the crap we’ve accumulated. 2010 was the year we were supposed to make contact. I’m sure we met somebody, somewhere and I’m sure he/she was a really nice person despite forgetting his/her name. 2012 is the year that supposedly the world is going to end. Forgive me if I don’t believe a prediction by a civilization of people who couldn’t predict their own destruction yet somehow has predicted ours. On December 22, 2012 we’ll all be saying “Hey that Mesoamerican Long Count calendar is nothing but an ancient Y2K hoax.”
Others have predicted our destruction to no avail. Take Harold Camping for example. The Rapture was supposed to happen this year on May 21st with the end of the world occurring on October 21st. He had been wrong before in 1988 and 1994. Keep trying until you get it right, eh Harry? For a supposed Christian radio host, the guy clearly needs to open up his Bible and I don’t know… read it? It clearly states in Matthew 24:36 that:
“No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father.”
No one except Harold Camping and his crazy numerology conclusions, apparently.
First of all, the Bible is not some secret, encrypted text where you need your Little Orphan Annie secret decoder ring to solve the hidden message. You don’t need numerology to read it. You don’t need a PHD in Theology from some quasi-religious institution. You just need to know how to read. And if you can’t read, you can just cop an audio version of it.
Second of all, even if the Rapture had occurred in May like Camping predicted, the world would not have ended in October. God is not going to destroy the universe. Wouldn’t that be like burning down your house because your kids can’t stop misbehaving? The Rapture predates the Great Tribulation which last 7 years and many believe will begin once Israel makes a peace accord with the Antichrist. After this Great Tribulation, Christ will return to Earth, vanquish Satan and his minions and begin his 1000 year reign. Granted, I didn’t major in mathematics in college but I’m pretty sure the time between May and October in the same calendar year doesn’t equal over 1007 years.
Maybe Christ will return in 2012. We’ll just have to wait and see. 2012 is right around the corner after all. 31 days to be exact. Feel free to stock up on canned goods and bottled water and mark “X’s” on your Mesoamerican Long Count calendar as the days go by.
Just don’t forget your blu-ray copy of Apocalypto. You’ll probably need something to watch the day after the world doesn’t end.
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